Pride, Its not somthing we are born with
by UNmiskakeable101
Summary: Bella is a freshman at Juliard with a full blown scholarship, for her talent on the piano, she has not yet uncovered all of her talents because of her holding back. But when of course A delicious looking boy comes in to her life she changes! please R/R
1. Chapter 1

The sky was clear and all I could hear was the music from my radio and the wind that was whipping in my face. Today I will be arriving at Julliard, I was lucky enough that I got a full scholar ship. The possibilities here were fabulous.

When I sent my admissions piece I was a little nervous, I mean its one thing when you have money and everything at your feet, but a total different story when you have fucking squat, with your whole family against you. So when I sent in my CD ROM with me playing two pieces on the piano,( that I had to use from the church across town) I couldn't even seal the envelope without my hands shaking.

Well I sure as hell flipped the fuck out I saw the international express mail man with a huge envelope in his hand. I stood their shaking when he handed it to me, of course I was so traumatized that I couldn't even take the damn thing out of his hand. I just sat there, mouth open like a gaping fish, trying to come with reasons with my self. So I did the only thing that I could do……

"Um.. Do you mind…..if you could open it for me?"

He looked at me curiously, "Why?"

" Well, ah, ok what does the address say?"

He looked down and squinted , then he chuckled, " Ahh, I see, its from New York and it has JULIARD written in the address box."

" So you see my dilemma?"

He gave me a big tooth grin and said, " ok"

I watched in terror as he shuffled his big bag to the side and took the envelope in his big hands, he even took a big breath. So agonizingly slow he flipped open the flap. I couldn't look any more my heart was going fucking haywire, I couldnt even hear the paper being pulled out because of the blood pounding in my ears.

I knew it was a while before I opened my eyes, so slowing I opened them, and when I eyes adjusted to the light, I saw in big black ink,

_Date: September 21, 2009_

_Juliard Applicant  
2000 Lenox Drive  
Forks, Washinton 08648_

_Dear Isabella Marie Swan_

_I am very pleased to inform you of your acceptance to Juliard as a freshman for Fall 2009. You have been admitted to the Academic Center for Entering Students (ACES) at Juliard._

_The ACES program is designed for students who are not yet established in the academic major (see enclosed description). As an ACES student, you will be encouraged to explore a wide range of academic majors available at Juliard. Through individual advising and collaboration with all of the USA University Schools, ACES advisors will work to connect you with majors that fit well with your academic strengths and future goals._

_We are confident that you will continue your high level of academic performance throughout the remainder of this year. This offer of admission is contingent upon your continued success. The Undergraduate Admissions Office requires that an official copy of your final transcript be forwarded upon completion of your high school course work. Please review carefully the enclosed materials that pertain to required deposits, deadlines, and other critical information._

_Best wishes and congratulations!_

_Sincerely;_

_Catherine Wishbone  
Director of Admissions_

I read that letter a million times before looking at the mail man again, he had a wide goofy smile, "congradulations"

I did the only thing a girl like me could do in that moment in time, I screamed, and squealed at the top of my lungs.

I jumped up and down and spun and i jumped at the mail man to give him a hug.

" OH MY FUCKING GOD! I CAN NOT BELIEVE IT! I GOT IN! I GOT IN! AHAHHHHHHH! ME! I AM GOING TO JULIARD BITCHES! WHOA! HELLL THE FUCKING YEAH!"

The mail man chuckled, wish me good luck and went about his way, I on the other hand went to the radio and turned up the music so loud that the walls were vibrating. I danced and sang and laughed so hard, that I was in tears.

And that is exactly why I didnt hear the foot steps of Charlie and Rene, aka; mom and dad.

" ISABELLA MARIE SWAN! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU!?"

I went to the radio and turned down the volume enough that they could hear me, but not enough were I couldnt hear the music, it was too good of a mood to spoil,I turned to face him with tear stained cheeks, but with a proud smug fabulous smile on my face, with my voice flamboient and sweet I replied.....

" Take a look dear ole daddy o," I gave him the sheet of paper that was my acceptance letter and stuck my chin out proudly, just like the brat I am.

When he took the paper with death written on his face,probably because I woke the house up with my squealing antics, he studied the paper and then he handed back to me, not with a smile, not with a frown, it was sort of monotoned, but then he smiled his skin crinkled smile with glossy eyes and said the words that he only said to me one time before, " I am pround of you Bells,"

I just couldn't believe he said that to me, it was one of the most happiest moments with him. I ran to him and threw my arms his neck and gave the biggest hugs a daughter could give her father.

I was so lost in my own moment that I didn't even realize that I tears running down my cheek, again. He returned the jesture with a weak effort but I knew that it didn't matter.

"Thank you daddy" I whispered in his chest, we let go of one another and we started to talk about when I would be leaving, I told him in a couple of days, which suprised him, but once I told him that I needed to get settled and work on more compositions for the future he agreed and we set a date before I would leave to go get the stuff i would need for my dorm.

_Oh My God, I have a dorm._

And, here I am now flying by in my new black chevy in the spraling city, Oh boy! it is cold!

And with that I roled up the window.

**I know I know its kinda cheesy! but it will get better this is just the preview, I wanted to explain alittle of the relationship with Charlie, I do drama way better, but please it would be so kind of you if you could make suggestions of what you would like, I will narrow those down and see what I can do!**

**please please review!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hey guys thanks for the reviews! I hope you like this one! sorry it took so long to write I ve had a busy schedule lately and i still needed to make a few adjustments. well here it goes! **

The bright and sprawling city was vivacious. Yeah it was cold, but you got this cleansing felling from it all; the frostbite wind, the grey sky, the noise, so different from Forks, other than the sky, but still, clean ,new, like all of your haunted nightmares, or faded memories that you keep so locked away just seems......ok. I am not the person that wants to forget, I have never liked the phrase "forgive and forget" nope, more like " asses the situation, analyze it and learn from it." If I forgot all the things that I have been through then I wouldn't be here today or become the person that I have become. I have one goal in life, and that is to get through this with every bit of passion that I can muster up and live through it. I am not proud, I don't have the right to be proud, until I can accomplish my goals and prove to all those fuckers out there who doubt me.

I pushed my thoughts away when I came to the long narrow drive way that lead up to my future.......Julliard.

There were trees that surrounded the campus, and plush grass,_ who knew there was grass in New York?_There was statues in the plush greenery by the parking lot. I noticed that the buildings were in a formation that surrounded the stone courtyard, with the huge stone water fountain in the center. The stones embedded in the ground and that was obviously part of the building structure had that old feeling to it, that classic aurora. _Medieval._

I got my carry-on bag and the bag that held most of my luggage and shifted it on my shoulders. It was all I could carry at the moment and on my way to the administration office i might as well kill two birds with one stone.

There were people out and about, there were some sitting by the fountain reading or listening to I-Pods, while others were under the shelter that appeared to be the main building. They looked as if they were in a huddle.

I watched unashamedly as the huddle broke, and out spasmed people doing all sorts of acrobatic movements, throwing and flexing their bodies in harmony with each other. They twisted and turned with a beat that was unidentifiable to me.

I realized that they were dancing, I watched and calculated the movements that were made, this elaborate dance was nothing if not normal, but at the same time it was beautiful and enhancing, sort of it's own johnra. It was as if they took two different types of dance together to create something between Swan Lake, and a scene from Boys in the Hood.

It was delicate, but unyielding, like crystal, soft, smooth, beautiful, sometimes unidentifiable, but hard cryptic.

The formation of dancers seemed to come to a close, as I sat through my thoughts. They were breaking away in a frenzy of exuberance and excitement.

I turned so I could head down to the administration office. I followed the sidewalk until I passed the building that was labeled as so.

I took a deep breath, and grasped the handle, it opened without difficulty, and I was immediately enveloped by the warmth that radiated from the inside, I already felt dry and stuffy.

Inside I couldn't but help but be a little amused that the office was a little cl-ashy, I mean come on! This is one of the most famous schools in the country and you couldn't have decorated a little more........well better! I know i am not here for design or anything but I know a little something!

As I took in the room I saw that the floors were carpeted with what seemed to be a off pink color, you know the kind that looks like vomit! Yeah the walls were a creamy beige color with the same vomit colored trimmings along the ceiling, there were some frilly couches by the doors with the same colors as the other vomit looking stuff in this room. There was a wood cherry colored coffee table in front of the couches with vase full of flowers( Vomit colored flowers!) I tried not to snicker, I looked in front of me to see that there were five windows along the wall with desks behind them. There were signs indicating which were which, One labeled :PROFESSORS along with the others that were labeled as SENIORS, JUNIORS,SOPHOMORES,and FRESHMAN. There were people behind each window looking down doing paperwork besides the freshman window this little piece of work was sitting behind the window texting away, she had unnaturally blond hair, ( you could see her dark roots) with tan skin, she looked from her posture to be tall, she wore a sleeveless pink blouse that rose up to her neck line with ruffles down the center, she looked to be very pretty.

I sat my bags down by the couch with my information in hand to walk up to the FRESHMAN window. I walked up thinking that she would notice me, but she didn't.

" uh hum"

Nothing.

I looked on the window to see a bell, I chimed it.

"DING"

............Nothing...........

"DING"

.............Still Nothing...........

God did the bleach she used to dye her hair fry her brain so bad that it damaged her fucking hearing senses!

I slammed that bell I little harder.

"DING!"

"What!"

Ha! that got her attention!

I looked at her she was fairly pretty, but all you could see was her really dark gloppy makeup. she had fair blue eyes, talk about an ice queen.

" Um yeah My name is Isabella Swan, I came to get my dorm assignment, miss.......?" I said this as I held out my hand.

She looked at it as though it was a three week old turkey sandwich that was left on her door step.

"Lauren" she retorted in a nasal tone.

Well I didn't want to shake hands with you anyway! I dropped my hand.

She looked at me expectantly before rudely said "Papers?"

I looked at my hand and gave her the papers which she so rudely snatched out of my hand. once she had my papers she looked at my information with a scowl plastered on her face. She looked them over,then turning her attention to the computer at her desk typing in something, then stood to go to the filing cabinet on the far wall behind her desk, she pulled out the third drawer pulling out a file and reading over it, the scowl on her face deepening so that her face cracked in wrinkles and her makeup appeared to be more gloppy. When she returned to the window she gave me the information and the file she pulled from the cabinet.

" There is a map of the school grounds and your schedule papers for this year, along with your dorm information, there is also the schools rules and guide lines, you need to sign the papers and return them to the Dean's office, Her receptionist Brenda Flask with set up an appointment for you to meet up with the dean and administrators." She said this with obvious resentment in her voice as it was filled with venom.

" Thank you Lauren" I said in a sugary sweet voice for her benefit. Hey you catch more flies with honey than you do vinegar.

She looked at me with pure hatred and slammed the window shut while pulling the closed sign over with a force.

I chuckled to my self as I walked to my bags and adjusted them on my shoulder.

When I walked out into the cold air, I noticed that there were more people about with bags and and boxes trying to get where they needed to be. I opened the file in my hands looking at the map. I noticed that there was a key in a clear bag with 4F on the side. I then looked back at the map and noticed that according to it that the floors are ordered by numeral and the room was ordered alphabetically. OK so now i know how to get to my room , but now i need to get to the building first.

I looked at the map again and saw that I was in the court yard, It seems that the dorm building are behind the main building I saw where the main building was and saw that it was right in front of me, Also saw that the location was were I saw that performance earlier. I looked to the side of the building and noticed a walk way to the side of it.

I started walking the long path and took more notice of the structure of the buildings they were beautiful, the grey stone lined on the walls were erotic. Once I was past the main building I noticed that there were four other buildings, they were separated two from two which indicated which were for boys and which were girls. I saw many bodies flowing in and out of the two buildings, most of the girls were coming from the right side, but being the overly cautious person that I am I looked at the map, and it turns out that the girls dorms were in fact the right sided. Hey! Just trying to avoid embarrassment, OK! No need in trying to make my self look like a freak.

I saw that I had building 1 and started off, there was grass in the lawn and bushes near the building under the windows. Once I walked in the lobby I was captivated by beauty of spacious room. This was NOTHING like the administration office, .NICE. There were various colors, and plush cream colored couches that you could just melt into. There was a glass coffee table, and HEY! NO VOMIT COLORED FLOWERS! But once I caught sight of the 45 inch wide flat screen TV, I was a little emotional. It was extravagant. shinny. perfection. I think I almost teared up. I actually might get to watch Family Guy.

There were painting on walls of beautiful ballerinas and instruments. There were photos of past generations and awards for the schools most gifted. I turned down the hall to look at the massive rooms there was a laundry mat, lots of practice rooms, and a little kitchen.

Once I got to the elevator at the end of the hallway I stepped in and pushed the button that had the number 4 on it. Once I got to the 4th floor I started to look for my dorm.

" A....B......C.....D....E... Ah F!"

I reached in my file for my key as I grasped the handle only to notice that it was already unlocked. I opened the door slowly to reveal a beautiful arranged living-set. The carpet on the floor was a soft sand color and the furniture wasn't overly fancy just comfortable creamy leather. Behind the couches was two big windows which I am sure that if you looked out you would see the front lawn. Just as I stepped through the threshold I black streak came running at me. I was so surprised that I dropped my bags and my paper work went every where on the nice sandy carpet.

Turns out that black streak was a person, she was short, a little past my shoulders, really skinny and pixie like, she had a crown of short spiky black hair with really extreme features. She had the most weird colored eyes, they were grey, I mean come on they were grey! Beautiful and unique. Gah! curse my no good damn plain features.

She jumped excitedly and extended her hand. " Hi I'm Alice Brandon! You must me my new roomie, thank gawd! The last one was a total witch! Thank Jesus that I went to the dean and demanded to get her out of my dorm! But, I know that you wont be like her, nope were going to be really good friends you'll see!"

I raised a timid hand to the speed induced pixie, " I'm Bella Swan, I came up here from Forks Washington."

She eyed me speculatively while shaking my hand, " Did you get here on a scholarship?"

"Yeah."

"Which one?" she eyed me again when she dropped her hand.

" The Academic Celtic Expense Society scholarship?......."

"OH MY GOD ROSE GET YOUR ASS OUT HERE!" Alice was jumping up and down squealing like a school girl.

To my left there was a hall way and coming down it was the meaning of all things beautiful, she was tall, honey blond, with the blue eyes and face to make a Victoria Secret model cry. She had on a leotard with a frilly skirt that covered the bottom of it. She has a duffel bag on her shoulder and a bottle of water in her left hand.

"Damn it Alice I have to get ready for practice or I'm going to be late! Whats the fucking hold up?"

Alice who had a little hop in her step bounced down to pick up the forgotten papers on the floor, looking through them till she found one in particular, she handed that one to Rose. Rose eyed it suspiciously, but she took it a scanned over it before her eyes bugged out of her head.

"Holy Shit you're Isabella Swan?" She asked astonished.

"Yeah"

"And your the one who got the ACES scholarship?" she asked.

"Uh....yeah"

" And you are our new roommate?" she asked again.

" Its says so on my key" I replied nervously.

" Well fuck me side ways and tie me to the bed post! Damn girl! You have to be damn good at whatever you do to get that kind of attention." she said as she gave me the the paper. " I'm Rosalie Hale by the way."

" Call me Bella, Um not to sound rude or anything but, how in the hell does every body know who I am?"

" Well how about Alice tell you, because I have got to go but it was nice meeting you and we will hang out later ok?"

"Ok, nice to meet you too." Isaid as she walked pass me through the door. She closed it behind her and I turned to Alice for answers.

" Ok so first before I tell you, lets get you situated your room." She said while walking to the right side of the room where there was a door on the far wall. I bent to pick up my bags and went to follow her. She had already opened the door and was in the room before I walked through.

Once I walked through the room I noticed two large windows on the left wall like the ones in the living area. The walls which were an off white except the wall in front of me was a rich dark blue. The wall on my right had floor to ceiling shelving. In the center held a shelve that was big enough to hold another flat screen. It wasn't as big as the one in the lobby, but I wasn't complaining. The shelves also had a built in desk. The blue wall held a waist high black dresser with a vanity. The wall on my left with the windows held a bare twin size bed. I looked to the wall beside me by the door and saw another black dresser that matched the one on the blue wall, but this one was came up to my shoulder length wise. It had a homey feel to it. I love it!

" Well I didn't expect this at all." I said with a smile.

" Well here they like their students to be comfortable, They think that if we are comfortable we will be more inspired, not that I am complaining." she chuckled.

" Yeah right." I resigned, I have never been able to be inspired by the comforts of home, all my inspiration comes from my past, and my determination not to let it dominate me. I looked over at Alice, she was staring at me with a pursed expression, looked as if she were speculating on asking a question or trying to figure out a puzzle piece, but she got her face in check and continued.

" Your room is similar to mine and Rose, except I have a purple wall and rose has a red, I'm starting to think that the rooms fit our personality perfectly."

I was about to ask what she meant about that, but thought better of it, cause I needed to get to my tuck to retrieve my things. " I gotta go get the rest of my stuff out of my truck, wanna come?"

she looked at me with a blinding smile before jumping and squealing," Hell yea I want to come, plus we can talk about your scholarship." she said this as we were walking out of the apartment.

"Ok so why am I known by all?" I asked as we walked into the elevator.

" Alright so this would be better if it was explained from the very beginning, ok?"

I nodded

" OK,......so three years ago there was this boy named Edward Cullen who was basically a musical prodigy, he was sixteen and they thought he should start college as soon as possible, the boy is a freaking genius, he could play anything he touched like a pro, plus his studies at his high school was 4.0, he was already getting all the credits he needed to finish, when the people here at Julliard heard of his specialities, they gave him a scholarship, The ACES scholarship that you have been so lucky to get. Unfortunately his family was too poor to pay for anything, they didn't even have two pennies to rub together, so they couldn't pay for anything to help him through here, the board was so devastated that they held a special meeting with the United States Board of Education, in his honor. They decided that when he was eighteen since he could start till then that he would have a full scholarship, everything paid for, the hole nine yards plus some. They updated the scholars fund and made it were it is almost impossible to get, you are the second one to receive it. Edward Cullen started up here last year, I've never seen him well mainly because I am a freshman my self. But from what I heard he is everything but imperfect, including his looks."

Wow, this is a big deal, really big deal. But I'm no prodigy! I can't live up to those expectations. This Edward seems like a real piece of work. I've never been special, I've always just loved to play, I used it as my outlet, something that I just erase my issues with, Its not something special, just me, and I am not special.

I was getting so panicked that I didn't even realize that Alice was asking where my truck was at.

"Bella! Where is your truck at, I would find it myself, but I have no clue what to look for?" she wailed.

I pointed to my vehical, and we moved to it, when we got there Alice let out a whistle.

" Damn Bella, I didn't know you liked to _ride big machinery._"

I just laughed at her as we grabbed boxes out of the truck of the bed and headed back up to the dorms.

As we passed by the fountain in the court yard, we heard the strumming of a guitar, we turned to go check it out, and saw a shaggy blond guy in dark blue jeans and a black T-shirt handling a guitar, while there was a girl with light brown hair singing to the melody, Oh my god it was one of my favorite songs by Toby Lightman; My Sweet Song. Her voice sounded alot like Toby, a little deeper but still damn good.

_My Sweet song_

_Its been a long time _

_What'd you coming around here for _

_Cause that old love is gone_

_yea_

_And I've since carried on_

_Thought I was rid of you for sure_

_My sweet sweet song _

_You don't sound so sweet no more_

The light brown haired girl walked along the crowd singing, swaying to the melody.

_Oh please don't sing to me_

_Oh cause it hurts for me to hear the melody that was good to me before_

_Oh my sweet sweet song_

_You don't sound so sweet no more_

She walked over to were the shaggy blond was playing the guitar, and put am arm around his shoulder.

_Oh you said that love was forever_

_And you told me love would never break my heart_

_And I believed you as I fell_

_Well that's all over_

_Let it go_

_Your just a song I used to know_

_And your fantasy it don't work for me_

_Go and pick on some one else_

The shaggy blond looked up from his cords smirking as the girl gave him a light shove on the shoulder as she walked away. I heard Alice's breathing hitch, I turned to look at her, finding out that she was watching the shaggy blond playing the guitar. The dreamy look on her face was priceless, but when I turned to look at the performance I saw Mr. shag himself was staring unashamedly at her back, with a smile of his own, just as dreamy as Alice. i chuckled thinking she was the total type to go over every detail of that special moment.

_oh oh oooooooh_

_Oh you said that love was forever_

_And you told me love would never break my heart my heart_

_And I believed you as I fell_

_Oh well thats all over _

_Your just a song _

_I use to know _

_And your fantasy it don't work for me_

_Go and pick on some one else_

_My sweet song_

_Guess I'm stuck with ya_

_And someday, I'll find the love that I'm lookin for_

_Then my sweet, sweet song wont sound so sad no more_

_Oh ooooh_

_My sweet sweet song, I guess I'll always be yours_

When the song was finished we hauled our asses back to the dorm, Rose was back and we told her about the performance. They offered to help me unpack, but I declined, that there was really personal stuff in there. When I was back in my room I took every thing from my clothes, to my keyboard to put up. I got fresh sheets that I brought with me from back home and put it on my bed. When most of everything was out and in its place I looked in the box beside my bed with my pictures and started putting them on the shelves. The last picture, The picture I valued the most I put by my bed side table. I then went to go and collect all of the boxes to put into the corner, I would take them out tomorrow before my trip to the deans office. When I was finally done and sweating from exhaustion, not bothering to take a shower got dressed in my blue shorts PJs and went to bed. I sat there thinking, I'm here, I've done it, now I just got to keep it. I promise I'll keep it for you.

**Whooo! My neck hurts! well hope you liked it! Ive been thinking about the play-lists for my chapters, I have some good Ideas what to do but, I'm a little short when it comes to the characters voices, so advise would be helpful. Please write in Ideas in which you would think are benefical. Thank you I love you all! Also when I do get my song choices up Please listen to them while you read my chapters, I think it kind of sets a mood. thanks again! xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**

** Love Kaylie Read and Review! I dont own twilight**


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